And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Randomize