I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize