normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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