Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
he shaved USA in his pubs
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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