ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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