It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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