god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
