Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Randomize