The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
