I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
