i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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