My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
