Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
