There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
