i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize