I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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