New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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