Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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