We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Watching her eat just hurts me
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
