I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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