why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
