i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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