I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
