wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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