No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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