what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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