I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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