Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
