this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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