zippers are such a cool invention
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
