I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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