Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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