So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
