It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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