He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
it's like heaven, but drunker
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
