She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
