I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
