well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
