Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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