He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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