I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
