This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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