hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Is it because I queefed?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
