What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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