I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
