I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
