Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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