He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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