So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize