phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
